Let's talk about aging.

Yuck. I hate my grey hairs and I hate my wrinkles around my eyes and mouth. I hate my boobies too. I hate that I hate them. I wish I could age graciously, but I just can't.

Tomorrow is a busy day for me at work. It's our annual conference and I am so excited. I have solicited all year long for vendor sponsorships to help pay for the conference. Now, it's here and I get to see that the tables get set up well and they all get taken care of. This is my favorite part about my job.

It's daylight savings! I get an extra hour of sleep - which tomorrow I will need it!

Husband is away this weekend fishing with the boys. I really hope he has a great time. Tonight they should be back and they are supposed to fry their catch. Ughh. Fried fish, beer, and poker. I'm jealous - mostly just about the poker part. I miss him, but he is probably having a great time. Kids are at my parents house, I and I am headed to bed.

Good night.

T. H. O.!!!

T.H.O.!! (Titty Hard On time)

I am so cold!

It's beautiful outside, sunny, but windy and cold. LOVE IT! But our furnace (BRAND NEW) is broken. The contractor has called the heating and cooling guy for help, but so far - it's no show city. At least it's not 20 degrees and snowing. I will only bitch online for a little while, then I'll stomp off to whine to the contractor again in about an hour.

I am about to go take a long hot bubble bath. I love my tub. Well, when it's clean, which is NOT after my son is done with it. It's a big jacuzzi tub and we use it all the time. I think I would use this tub way more than I would use a hot tub. I like knowing that I'm not soaking in chemicals and the water is clean. Not a sperm bath. Not that we ever have sex in a hot tub... :)

Meanwhile.... I sent my kids to the mailbox to get our mail. It requires a key. The post office lady called and asked if I am missing my keys..... why yes, I am. THe little turds left my keys in the key hole. Ugghh. Is that what I get for handing my keys over to a 7 year old?

Today I paid bills. I made those follow up calls to the places you hate doing. I sat on hold for YEARS with many companies. It was a fun filled day - and I am still in my slippers and didn't brush my teeth. yuck.

Tonight I am going to the Pure Romance party across the street. I am excited to just get out of the house and not chase kids. I am excited to drink froo froo drinks and crawl home if I wanted to. But first, I think I should hit my caffeine stash - all those bills have me exhausted.

I raked leaves yesterday, and the day before that and the day before that. And again today. Tomorrow I will give up. What pisses me off, is that the damn tree the leaves are coming from is in the neighbors yard.

Sticky Toe Nail Clippings

One of my biggest pet peeves about my husband - or anyone in general (I think this one ranks #9): Clipping their toe nails and not cleaning them up. YUCK

My husband will often clip his toe nails while sitting on the edge of our bed. Does he go vacuun that shit up afterwards? Hell No. Gross. Yuck. Then I find them attatched to the bottom of my socks or my clean damp feet when I get out of the shower.

Why is it that children can't often think ahead enough to get a towel BEFORE they get into the bath or shower? They must also know that this is my pet peeve #54 because they don't bother asking me to get them one, instead they run through the house SOAKING wet looking for one. Now, as I walk the halls, the carpet is wet and therefore my socks are now too.

Enough bitching about other people's downfalls..... for now.

Sometimes,... I'll be sitting at my desk at work or in traffic and I think - what's hubby doing? I call him. He gets all giddy - apparently he was thinking of me at that very moment too and was just about to call me. That makes me warm inside.

The weather here has been AMAZING the past two days. NO RAIN = AMAZING. Oregon - go figure. The temp has been about 70 each day and sunny. I love it. It makes me want to do yardwork, but here at the new house, it also makes me depressed that we don't have a yard. Since it is new construction, the builder only paid for landscaping for the front yards, so the back yards are up to us. Our back yard it nothing but a mud whole. It's horrible. You can't even walk back there because this mud is the very sticky kind. I have a feeling that we won't have the money of energy to tackle the back yad until next spring. Bummer. So..... I mow the front yard and rake it at least once a week. over and over again.

So I briefly felt very OLD tonight. I went with a friend to a place that requires you to be 21 or older. She is having a Pure Romance party and wanted to find some gag gifts to give out as party favors, so this place was full of TOYS. We walked in and she instantly got carded. (she's 25) I started to get mine out automatically and then realized... wait a freakn minute... he didn't ask me for my id. WTF? I asked - do you card everyone? He said no, only those under 26. My eyebrow raised and I stared him down. Then he got "it". "Can I see your id mam" he said - I said - "good call, I was about to walk back out the door". BUT - the BASTARD did call me "Mam". He is twice my age - but still. I managed to NOT spend a dime there - I'm holding out to support her party!

Later Gators...

Ooops, was that the bitch in me peeking out?

I feel like a dumbshit. A whiny dumbshit.

Ok, so the DISH situation has me a tad bit embarrassed. After all my whining, yelling and sarcasm to the DISH customer service people, I find out that the damage to my siding only added up to be worth about $150.00. I was thinking like thousands of dollars worth of damage - oops.

Things are good in sweet potato bump. Football season is almost over, but soup season carries on and on. If you are a descendant of my father's - soup season is all year long. But in my world, it is soup, candle and Joni Mitchell season.

I am trying to think of things to talk about - ...... Funny things, not depressing.

Here's a joke - then I will excuse you from reading ...

what do you call a "bee" who gives milk?

a boobie

My ten year old told me that one - and it's the only one I can ever remember.

begone now....

DISH - I am standing my ground!

Well - another day here in the pacific NW. I think today we are going to go to the pumpkin patch. I am not thrilled about this venture - but the kids are. In return that makes me a little bit tingly. It's not raining - in fact, it's sunny -partly cloudy.

But first I have to wait for the DISH man to arrive. They are not coming to my house on good terms. Last month we had the satellite installed and got horrible service. After calling for help again, we found out by another technician that the place the first technician installed it was incorrect and it had to be moved. When the 2nd tech moved it to the roof, left behind in my BRAND NEW SIDING was SIX LARGE holes. UGLY. Brand. New. House. Not to mention the horrible routing job that was done along the bottom of the siding with the wires. Each time he connected the wire to the house, there was another hole drilled in.

When my new neighbor moved in, he brought his DISH tech over to my house before installing and said - "Don't bother installing it if it's gonna look like this" WTF? His installation looked great and you can't even see the wire

Here's my analogy for DISH. If I had a brand new CAR - would it be ok to drill six huge holes into the side of it? NO - why is it ok to do it with new house? This is my LARGEST investment in my life (other than my kids will take care of me when I am old and poop my pants).

I am also waiting for the siding man to arrive. I am asking him to give me an estimate for the repaired back to the way it was. I want it to be replaced - not repaired.

What's my husband's take on this? He is thrilled that I am tackling it. He sees my FIRE and RAGE and just giggles. He is hoping to get DISH to pay us a check for the replacement and takingthe check to the bank. NOPE.,.,,... not gonna let him. He just wants a new dirt bike. I want my brand new siding back.

I am also watching The Price is Right - hasn't Bob Parker croaked yet? WOW - he's OLD!

DISH IS HERE! LATER!

Yo

Here I am - trying to be focused and work on my resume - but I can't. I will another day. Don't tell the husband that though.

I'm hungry and I want some starbucks. My butt hurts and I am cold.

shower
go get coffee

then i can focus - right?

Well, we had a get together last weekend - a few for that matter. We bought a keg of beer - thinking we were only getting a 1/4 keg and got the whole dang thing. We have a great connection - so the cost was minimal compared to what it could have been. My point is.... we had alot of beer and not alot of people to drink it. There could be worse problems.

That was Friday night, so come Sat, we invited people over for POKER to drink up the leftover beer. We has three friends come and of us five - only 2 of them drank. I couldn't do it. I am getting OLD! To be honest - I was exhausted just by staying up the night prior, I was suprised I didn't need to spike my pepsi with some caffeine!

So... I am only writing today because I haven't written much and I wanted to be sure not to neglect this site I created. I have alot to say - but not the energy to explain the situations - so I will keep them to myself.

I need to take a shower - I am freezing!

later gators

GAZILLIONS of people in my new house - NO PROBLEM

Time to clean - where's my energy? I have a messy house and about a gazillion people coming over in about two days. Usually my stress overload would be going crazy, but today - I can't focus on the house. ANYTHING ELSE.

I think I have logged onto the net three times now. The DISH man came and the phone has rang 14 times - so my procrastination isn't the only one to blame for the unproductive day.

I feel like yuck. The rain has come and I miss my old fireplace. I want a blanket, cup of soup and a good book or movie. Lifetime. But then I would feel really guilty.

In two days we are having a houswarming party. WOuldn't you freak out too? It will kick in anyday. Most likely on the day of.

Bills, ADD and a tropical beach

Ok, so I made an aggreement with my husband that I would take over doing the bills once I go to part time. Uggg. We have lived here for 5 weeks now and I have put it off. Things are due. I need to pay them. We have the money to pay them, but for some reason I can't get myself to do it. I dont want to. I need to force myself. Every day I say today is the day and then something way more important comes up.

If we have the money to pay them, then what's the problem? Well,... I like to spend. I am afraid that once I look at the account and become aware of my limits, then my shopping will have to stop. I have been buying for the new house (curtains and such) but I have been selective as far as clearance and sale items, but .... you know. Damn girl, you FREAKIN QUIT YOUR JOB!!

Today - AFTER PAYING THE BILLS - I am going to the school to talk to my daughter's teacher. She is behind in her classwork. This is nothing new for her. She likes to day dream and not finish things unless she is hounded. Her last teacher (4th grade) suggested looking into meds - it could possibly be ADD. That's hard to hear. This suggestion came at the end of the year, so my husband and I chose to wait until her 5th grade teacher had a chance to witness her behavior and see what they say.

At home, she is the same way and it drives me crazy. I tell her to go do something, and 10 minutes later she is found doing something else, not even a thought to go do something what she was told. She wonders alot, but doesn't stay focused. Her teacher said that girls with ADD are harder to diagnose because they are wired and hyper alot of the time like boys, just day dreamers. That's for sure with her.

The rain came today - it started last night and it felt good. I love the rain, but I was born and raised in Oregon, I better love the rain. I had the window open and the rain was blowing in onto the bed. I was all snuggled in and sleeping comfortably when my husband pointed out we were getting wet, so I shut the window. So now I need to go for that walk and it's time for it to stop.

I want to go lay on a sunny beach too. One of my co-workers is going to Florida next week. They aren't excited about it, but I am jealous. If I didn't love Oregon, I would certainly be living somewhere tropical. Husband wants to retire in the woods - the cold woods someday, but not me, I want a beach and some Jimmy Buffet. I think I can negotiate both, who knows. I also want to be around the grandkids, assuming my daughter can focus enough to have some :) Listen to me, she's ten. My son... If I can keep the dare devil out of the hospital - then he will be a daddy, I'm sure of it.

ok,... so have I stalled enough? Bills..... Go do the bills lady! damn it.

right after I eat some breakfast....... of course.

gross fuzzy pillow -

Damn Skippin...

This is the freak'n life. I am online.... in my bed (11:40 am) and posting on my blog. Just the way I imagined it. Don't get me wrong... quit thinking that. Just so you know - the dishwasher is going, the washer and the dryer are running (with clothes), I have swept and picked up the house and responded to all my emails. I will get more work done soon, but I had to stop and take a breather.... I got winded with all that work. I guess I need to get my ass in shape, cause the house is still a mess.

Please visit this website www.portlandstarlightstudio.com It's my new neighbor across the street's brand new website. I think it looks great. She does great work. I hope to hire her for some family portraits soon.

So I have alot to say - but not much in the way of nice things - so I will hold off. It's mostly about my spouse. Yesterday we had an awful day and I am still bitter about it. Tomorrow is our anniversary - wowza - THIRTEEN YEARS!! I have been training that man for thirteen years and we still have so far to go! Even though he PISSES me off at times, he is still my best friend and partner. I can't ever imagine my life without him in it. Isn't it amazing how men think so differently than women?

I have a new niece coming into the world in TWO WEEKS. She is a scheduled C-section. Scheduled my ass, she will decide if she wants to come sooner. Gabriella Grace. I am excited to meet her and hold her, love her and smell her. Until she shits her pants then I will be promptly giving her back. They will have three children. Wowza again. Three. I have two, sometimes two too many. Children are messy critters and don't arrive independant or let you sleep in.

I watched a show on TLC where they had 16 children. OMG. Just because women are CAPABLE of that crap doesn't mean we need to put out that many. They apparentely have enough money to support all these children because they were building a huge 7000sqft house and had a designer from NY to help them furnish it. So I won't knock on them too hard since they have money to support their army - it's the mothers with 12 kids that live off of welfare that piss me off. Blah blah... they piss everyone off...

ok... so I sit here. I look over on my bed at my little shit dog and think "yuck - she needs a bath and she is sitting on my bed" then I look over at my husband's pillow. OMG YUCK!! YUCK!!! EWW!! He went and got a hair cut (buzz) yesterday and apparently didn't take a shower before he went to bed. There is hair ALL OVER his white pillowcase and on his side of the bed. I wonder how long it will take before he notices and changes it. I am on strike - that's gross. I will keep you informed.

ok, it's officially noon.... the dryer has stopped and my tummy is rumbly. Time for some Joni Mitchell and a PB and banana sandwhich.

Office Supply Agent slash Drug Dealer

Hola My Friends

Just checking in. Not much new to say. I am planning my sister's baby shower for this weekend and next weekend is our block party with our neighbors. We are just the party fools! Not really. But kind of. Tea and coffee at one and BEER at the other. LOTS of BEER.

I can't type long, I have a meeting in a few, but I thought of this blog as I sat at my desk eating my lunch. I am eating a "vegetarian's nightmare" sandwhich from the brew pub across the street. I work with A LOT of vegetarians, so I almost want to hide in the closet while I eat it. I think it has 17 different kinds of meats on it and some tomato with lettuce. Don't forget the fancy mustard that I always forget about and regret as soon as I bite in. You could say I get a cramp in my jaw when I open to take a bite. BIG. My husband would be proud I can open my mouth that big :) NAUGHTY JOKE!

ok, I should go. Must attend a meeting about office supplies. Don't ask. I went from being a drug dealer to ordering office supplies on the side.

It's Been Ordered - GET OFF MY BACK!

Well, I did it- or he did it. "We" ordered internet - but it can't be installed for another two weeks. (Isn't it funny how when he does something, we (ladies) say "WE" did it?)

As it turns out when you live in a new home, new construction that is, everything take longer to get hooked up.

I thought I would have had internet in the house by now, but we have cell phones and didn't want to have to get a land line just to get service so we took a while to shop. We got a rockin deal on some wireless and some serious fast internet shit. OR so they say. I won't know for two weeks. What I am really freakin excited about is laying in bed, watching TV and also surfing the net (or BLOGGING) at the same time.

So that's it. My excuse for setting up this blog and not being faithful to it. I will get better, I promise.

So ..... update on my employment status.... I am the official Purchasing Specialist who works two days a week for the same place I worked for the past 3.5 years. This is exciting for me, but at the same time a tad frustrating. I loved my job until last year when it got to be too much for one person to do. I complained, or whined and nothing happened. Now that I quit, they realized that it may be too much for one person and added a whole new position. I was heard, but it took me quitting first.

I am home all the other days cleaning and sorting through boxes. Yew Haw. The first few days I was so overwhelmed I ran in circles not completing anything. The moment I gave up and sat on my ass in front of the TV to watch some divorce court, my mom came waltzing in. I want her to feel comfortable to waltz - just not to catch me doing anything I am embarrassed of. Should I set some house rules for my mother??? Reminds me of my bedroom door = privacy rule when I was a teenager, but that never stood up either.

Being back in my home town makes me reminisce of high school. I have ran into old school mates, some good memories, some funny and some I hope have been forgotten by all others. I got snubbed by some classmates the other day. They acted like they didn't see me and walked right past me. Screw em. My daughter plays softball with theirs, but MINE IS WAY BETTER! Of course she is, I was her coach - up until now.

That brings me to that.... softball. I am so bummed. I used to coach my daughter's team where we lived before. I love coaching. Now that I work part time I wanted to continue, but it seems the softball situation in our small town is completely taken care of by a guy and his daughters. They don't seem like they have the need for more coaches. I can't tell. I have offered many times, but haven't been taken up on the offer, so I am backing off. I should get back into playing myself, but we (husband and I) don't want to drive into the city all the time just yet. I am thinking of playing on a kickball league.

ok, I need to get to work and go home. I am catching a cold - stuffy head and sore throat. I took some meds this morning that cleared my nose, but also completely CLEARED my head. I felt like a airhead all day. Couldn't focus. As soon as the meds wore off, my throat started to scratch and I sound like I smoke 2 packs a day.

Later Gators..... until next week or sooner. or later. who freakn knows.

Me and my man. 13 years next month - Wow, did we really get together when I was 9? (Tomorrow's my b-day - remember? turning 22? :)

Make it stop!

I am such a loser at this BLOG thing!

I didn't put very much thought into the fact that I wouldn't have internet access for a while when I created this thing. We still don't, but I am stealing a few minutes from work to type and update. I had already forgotten my password to this thing, so that took a "few minutes" alone!

Last week - this is how it went. (All within SEVEN FREAK'N DAYS!)

went to the Seattle water park for daughter's B-day party (5hrs in car - 5hrs at water park)
sold our home
bought a new home
gave my two week notice at work
moved our household
directed a kickball tournament / picnic for 200 people
had a job interview

This week is running a little better, but I still can't find my favorite pair of jeans or my daughter's toothbrush. I haven't had time to go to the store to buy her a new one, so she is sharing mine. There is something REALLY wrong with that.

We should be getting internet in our home someday soon. Until then, I discovered that the small coffee shop slash interior decorators shop slash architect office slash whatever else they can cram in the tiny house has wireless internet. (thanks to the bank next door he said) So - the coffee is "so so" but the silence is wonderful there. It's certainly not the type of place I imagined to see in the same town that still has a huge tractor parade every year!

I haven't really missed the internet home connection just yet. That's suprising to me. Now that I am not infactuated with finding a home on the real estate market and also now that I am not reading my work emails every day and night, I haven't needed it as much as before. I get home, I eat, and I go take a long bath in my new big jacuzzi tub and then I crawl into my bed that is still on the floor. We can't decide where in the room to put it, but we have had a total of 10 minutes together in the past 8 days - that discussion will have to wait.

Did I mention that I can't wait for my fall line-up on TV? Grey's Anatomy! I miss my McSteamy man!

I guess I must go and earn my pay check. I just got back from a long lunch with a friend. TOMORROW is my BIRTHDAY! I am such a birthday princess, but this year it really snuck up on me. Am I really going to be 22? Wow, last year went fast!

Later Gators - If there are actually any gators that read this..... See ya round like a donut.

It's the FINAL COUNT DOWN - Holy Crap

So......

Um... HI! Where - how do I start. Flow.... words..... go... any. day. now. (Lori! Help!)

I have so much going on in my life and in about 2.5 weeks I most likely will be bored out my mind. I decided to start this blog for few reasons. My family of four will be moving back to my hometown (poplulation of 900) in less than 3 days. Tomorrow I am putting in my notice at work and I will become a stay at home mom to my two young children and the obedient wife to my husband of 12 years. Yeah right... That part was added in just for him. I giggle every time I re-read the sentence.

This decision we made together has me dealing with many mixed emotions, but mostly excitement. It's been at least 5 years since I worked part time and that was when my baby boy was two. I went to work full time for my own personal reasons (those reasons are to come as we get to know each other.....) and I have always been torn and felt guilty since then that I have been taking away from my children. Financially - we could have made stricter spending decisions and made it work to have me at least just work part time - but we fell into that make more = spend more routine.

Being home to raise them means so much to me. Less chaos, organization, Christ, I even said I would do the bills every month. Before, I just had to work my full time job, deposit my little paycheck and be the shopper for the family. I also did most of the housework and other Mom duties, but now it's a WHOLE NEW BALL GAME. Do I now have to kneel in front of him (the bread winner) and beg for my Starbucks allowance? No Starbucks in Yamhill, so I am a little bit safe. I think the nearest one is at least 8 miles away - it won't be probably a week before I google and mapblast the nearest store. Better yet, I'll text my home girl (literally a hometown girl) Keri - she's more of a coffee freak than me.

My current job is our bread and butter, so we will have to do without the new hot tub, ski boat, husband's Harley, and of course, my new melons. I know it will only be a matter of adjustment to the income level and lack of toys, or who knows, just until I go freak'n lack of caffeine crazy and become the greeter at Walmart just to fill my caffeine needs. HA! My 10yr old daughter just suggested I give pedicures for a living - um, yeah - touch other people's dirty moldy feet. AIN'T THAT CAFFEINE DESPERATE - yet.

Let me state very clearly that I am so appreciative and grateful for this opportunity to be home to raise the kids. I have some VERY CLOSE friends of mine who are are single moms. I can not even begin to imagine how they do this and keep their sanity. MB and TD - you guys are amazing. You are two of the strongest people I know and your girls are very lucky to have you as role models. I know they are as proud of you as I am. Your children clearly reflect what a great job you have done - all three are beautiful and brave girls.

Great - I have myself crying on my very first post. Stop that. Enough... I shall now go down stairs and feed myself with some double chocolate fudge brownie ice cream and fresh strawberries. I'm not sure where your from, but to us Oregon hicks - getting emotional = ice cream.